I am wise in the way I have grown old.
At first, being retired was terrible, like having my hands cut off, or being a banana without a peel.
I have a skill that is still useful and vital, but now I am learning to let go, to let things flow through me, flow past me, flow through my fingers or my conscious thoughts, without grasping them.
I understand some important things about people:
Drives, needs, physiology, need for stability and need for growth.
The need for support and the need for adventure.
I understand some of the weight of different social pressures, and the need for a livable pace.
Being able to balance doing and being matters to me.
Never losing the prayerful center, the I/Thou is crucial.
Holding heart and head in balance, even though often feeling only wobble, not steady state.
St. Ignatius said we should try to always be in contemplation in action.
I see medicine as service, rather than as a platform of authority. I see we all need to continue to be useful as we are able. Every day is a new challenge in being useful in some way.